Gift and Responsible

Assalamualaikum and Holla, readers.

Guys, do you realized that we are in early Muharram and it seems like at the end of the year, 2011. welcome,December! sigh. yeah, time goes and left us behind without any sign. for example, like there's nothing gadget ,or notification that tell you the time had just past for several  minutes,hours, day, week and bla,bla,bla. a watch is an exceptional because it just show you the time, but it cannot ask,inculcate,or knocked your head and telling you that, HOI, AQILAH BANYAK MASA DAH TERBUANG NI. see, i told you. even the most branded and scarce watch can't be like that.unless, you are the person who always concern about your daily management and rethink all the activities you had done for the whole day. yes, you are the 'higher motivation' person i ever met!writing is more easy and attractive, but when it comes to perform or do the action, it turn to suck.


first week turn to second week.yet, the previous cases say goodbye and the new case greats me with a big, big, big SMILE. yes, it just the cynical analogy. it  happened to me, every week, since i decided to pursue my study in medical school. this is what we called TUTORIAL. now, i have a second tutorial with my new group, and Alhamdulillah, everything work well.but, the most vital is, i can mingle and adapt with the new idea, environment, and spirit!

this is the most powerful word that my father always remind me when it comes to inconvenience, barrier and hard situation.whenever, the word DOWN and SAD spread in my mind, this magical chanting will lights the sorrow heart. yes, it make you feel relieve, eternally. therefore, we are encourage to say Alhamdulillah, not only for His delectation, but also the barrier that He gives to us as the best remainder.

Allah, my Lord, i'm very grateful with all your gift since i start to breath until now.thank you, my creator.

medical school opened my eyes widely. it is not just a precious knowledge, but it teach you an attitude of being responsible as a professional doctor.some will say that it is too early to feel the reality of doctor's life in freshman year, but i start to feel the trust, hope and higher expectation from community toward this profession. my lecture said that the analogy of being doctor, can be similar to the god. long times ago, human believe that the doctor can be symbolized as a god. besides that, medicine is a knowledge from the god to the the gifted one. i heard this statement in, ermm, i dont remember, but maybe it is from taklim or usrah in my faculty. 

the responsible become tougher, and i just dont know where exactly the right path for me. half of me is really desire and passion with this profession, while 30% of my heart telling me that, what are you doing aqilah. what are you doing with your time. arrrrghhhh, it complicated! yet, i dont know, what im gonna be when my foot start to step in  UKM for clinical years.obviously, it will make my world turn to 360 degree.who knows?moreover, do you have a strong feel to suggest your family's patient to bring the patient back and gather with family after all prescription cannot be proceed due to more complication and low economy?can you? yes, the doctor can.yes, my doctor (my lecture did ) did.i startled. but me? i just dont know.sigh.hmmmm.i asked my friend, and she told me that, every each of doctor will experience this situation.we need to prepare.

AND

i just need to be strong

note: instead of telling ayah and sumie, i think this is the right medium for me, myself, to explore more about my life.i remember once ayah said that kakak ada 6 tahun lagi.sekali gagal, cuba lagi. mungkin kali ini tak cukup lagi usaha.yup, ayah has his right points.he knows me better.

status: is preparing for the next academic communication exam tomorrow with UKM :D